A few days ago I was working with a client who was moving her dog grooming business to a small complex near our shop. Once I thought I understood how she wanted her sign to look, I promised to email her a proof and asked for her email address.

 

A short while after sending the promised proof, I noticed that my email to her had bounced back. I double checked what I had written down as her address and then decided to call her and see what was wrong. The address was simple, something like michelle123@xmail.com, and when I read it back to her she said that I had it right, so I promised to try again. Again it came bouncing back. 

 

We were certainly wasting time, but when I had her on the phone once more, I made her spell it out and paid attention this time. Sure enough, I was off by one letter, as she spelled her version of “Michelle” as “Mechelle”, which looks odd in print even here. 

 

When I admitted my mistake, she responded, “Oh, yes, a lot of people put an ‘i’ in my name (no wonder), but it is actually spelled three E’s.” The third email went through alright, but after wasting time dealing with this silly problem, once more I reflected on a pet peeve of mine, and perhaps every other signmaker in America, for that matter. And that is the silly notion many parents have about how to personalize the little miracle they just brought into the world by spelling their child’s name with some odd and creative version they just made up. Clever? Not to me, or maybe even not so much to the young woman I was dealing with who will be missing her emails the rest of her life.

 

Not only has this little trend caused me to screw up any number of signs through the years, for some people it surely means an ongoing string of errors with the spelling of their name, from grade school awards to college diplomas, from email addresses to payroll checks. And worse, they will spend an inordinate amount of the limited minutes of each day spelling and re-spelling a name the spelling of which was figured out a long time ago. Talk about re-inventing the light bulb!

 

Sometimes these variations may just seem silly, but others might be considered downright disrespectful. After all, there are names that are so historically important that I’m not sure they should be messed with. Take the name “John” for example. Every time I see it shortened to the three letter version, it seems like an insult to all the great Johns through the ages, from John Hancock to John Wayne. Why, it seems to me the Good Book settled that particular spelling a long time ago. After all, it isn’t the Gospel according to “Jon,” is it?

 

I hate to admit it, but this confounding plague has hit even closer to home. Yes, too close for comfort as my own dear sister, who’s grandfather’s grandfather was from right here in Texas, while my back was turned went and named her first born son Austin, …and spelled it “Austen.” AUSTEN? What kind of new age, politically correct version of that name is “Austen” supposed to be? A seventh generation Texan who can’t spell his own name, a name he shares with the father of the Republic of Texas? Tell me it isn’t so!

 

Unlike my nephew, I personally missed the effects of this recent trend toward alphabetical chaos, since my parents and their contemporaries usually weren’t guilty of playing the “make it up as you go” name game. No one had much trouble spelling my name, or the names of most kids I went to school with. That was a good thing back then, and it’s still a good thing now, since I like people spelling my name right the first time, and I like getting my emails on the day they were sent.

 

But, not all of us are so lucky, and even if we are, as signmakers and sign spellers we know better than to take anything for granted this day and time. Make them spell it, and spell it twice, for when it comes to names, it’s a roll of the dice. 

 

Until next time, I hope you get all your emails, catch every mistake, and have a really a great month.